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Thursday, December 6, 2012

No escape from the pursuer in your mind

I realized this morning that you can't escape from a pursuer in a dream. I was dreaming that a man was chasing me through a house. This house was a labyrinth of halls and stairways and rooms and doors. I made it into a small room and locked the door behind me. My pursuer was banging on the door to get in. I turned to survey the room, when I noticed another smaller door on the adjacent wall. A momentary idea to use it to escape was undone when I heard the man stop banging on the door to run to the other door, the door he couldn't have known about.

That was when I realized in my waking state why I could always stay a step ahead of my pursuer but never really escape. The pursuer knew about the other door almost as soon as I knew about it. And I knew his intentions as soon as he went for the other door. Because I and my pursuer were both part of my subconscious, part of me. We were two parts of the same person. One couldn't learn something without the other learning it a second later.

What does this mean? That I am both predator and prey? That I prey on myself, and simultaneously fear myself?

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